How and why it happens, 34 symptoms and bad effects of obsession

It may be you who are obsessed with them or they may be obsessed with you. Unless you know the signs of obsession, you won’t realize it.

When you fall in love with someone for the first time, it’s natural to think about them a lot. You replay conversations, anxiously await the next meeting, and maybe even doodle their name during a boring lecture. But there’s a huge leap between these butterflies in your stomach and tracking their movements via GPS – one is cute, the other, not so much. It’s important to recognize where we draw the line between affection and exaggeration. In the early stages of a relationship, it’s exciting to feel connected and involved in each other’s lives. However, it is important to understand the signs of obsession that indicate when involvement turns into intrusion. It is important to be aware of these signs not only in others, but also in yourself.

Being alert to signs of obsession helps maintain healthy boundaries in a relationship. This prevents the kind of excessive involvement that could turn a romantic comedy scenario into a thriller.

Psychology behind obsessive love

Love is like a rollercoaster, isn’t it? Sometimes thrilling, sometimes terrifying, but always a ride. But when does that exciting journey start turning into obsession? Let’s understand the science behind it, shall we?

Suddenly, it’s not just about sharing milkshakes and taking long walks. It’s 24/7 texting, a series of “where are you” messages, and an uneasy feeling that you’re being watched more closely than a cat looks at a laser pointer. That’s when you start thinking about those obsessive love signs.

So, what is the science saying?

First of all, our brains are wired for connection – thanks, evolution! But sometimes, this wiring gets a little messed up, especially when our attachment styles *think of them as your relationship blueprint* get involved.

Some people have a secure attachment style – they’re like quiet, Netflix-and-chill types of lovers.

Others’ style may be anxious or avoidant, which may indicate passion in love.

Then there is our old enemy, low self-esteem. Imagine your self-esteem as a little cheerleader inside your mind. If she’s feeling good, she’s cheering you on, and you’re feeling confident and secure in your relationship.

But if he’s a little depressed, suddenly every text left on “Read” feels like a personal criticism, and you start to double-guess your partner’s affection. This is where the line between passionate love and obsessive love begins to blur.

You see, when self-esteem declines, it often invites jealousy and possessiveness to the party – these are classic obsessive love signs.

It’s like having a little gremlin in your head that constantly whispers, “Are they really into you? Better check their phone when they’re not looking!” Not exactly a healthy mindset, right?

But in obsessive love, it’s as if your brain is on a never-ending sugar rush, and constantly wants more attention and affection to maintain that high.

This chemical cocktail can lead to behaviors that tick off those boxes on the ‘signs of obsession’ checklist.

You may find yourself constantly looking for reassurance, or your thoughts may become as sticky as a wet pair of jeans. It’s not just about loving someone; It is about needing them for your emotional survival.

So, when does the switch turn from ‘over the heads’ to ‘obsessed over the heads’? It’s all about balance. Like a rocky relationship, a healthy relationship has ups and downs but generally remains stable.

Obsessive love, on the other hand, is like a squirmy child kidnapped by a hyperactive child – wildly up and down and all over the place.

Subtle signs of obsessive love to pay attention to

Maybe you don’t think you behave obsessively, maybe you think calling them 50 times a day is normal—it’s not.

If you think getting approval for what you wear tonight is an exercise in their styling techniques – it’s not. So, whether you are obsessed or someone is obsessed with you, you need to know the signs.

The obsession is picture-perfect…in the beginning. Pay attention to these signs of obsession and take care of your heart.

1. You feel like something is wrong

If you read this, you already know something is not right. You’re already feeling a little uneasy about the whole relationship, which is a great thing.

2. You have no personal space

In healthy relationships, you don’t need to see that person every day. Sometimes, you just want a day to go to the beach alone or read a book in the bathtub.

3. Privacy? What kind of privacy?

They have your passwords to your social media and email because they need to know what you’re up to at all times. They have to make sure that you are not cheating them.

You have no privacy anymore, they own you. If you’re lucky you have privacy in going to the bathroom alone.

4. Jealousy to the max

Jealousy is an understatement for how they feel. They don’t like it when people look at you, they don’t like it if you wear very sexy clothes. To be completely honest, they just want you to stay home stuck in a sack of potatoes.

If you have friends of the opposite sex, this won’t work for them. They are insecure and cannot tolerate any danger.

5. They pull you away from friends and family

In the beginning they are comfortable with your friends and family, but after some time, they start pushing you away from them. They don’t like your friends, your family annoys them, or they feel like your parents don’t like them.

This is all drama. They just play the victim so that you feel bad and stand by their side. This means giving up your friendship for them.

6. They believe you cheated on them

If you don’t reply to their text after fifteen minutes, you cheat on them. If you call them back an hour after you finish work, you are cheating. In fact, they don’t believe anything you say.

7. They say “I love you” too soon

Oh, yes, sure, they’re in love. It’s been a day, but they know it. They feel that this is true love. You don’t even know how they like their eggs in the morning, but they love you.

If they toss around this phrase like it’s nothing, that’s a problem. Some people really feel love. However, if you’re on edge it’s probably not true love.

8. It’s all about your safety

They just want to protect you. They don’t want you to go out with your friend tonight because they want to keep you safe.

They must go with you to the shopping mall because they don’t want to bother you. It all sounds sweet, but it’s nonsense. You can do whatever you want, and you don’t need protection unless you ask for their help.

9. You are perfect… but

There’s always a but. They tell you all the time how perfect you are but also criticize you for small things. Maybe you’re beautiful, but you should lose ten pounds.

10. You feel like you’re going crazy

This shows that they try to manipulate and control you. If you feel like you’re not you anymore, it’s because you’re not. They try to take away everything from you and make you their personal slave.

11. They will never let you go.

Oh, so cute, isn’t it? Picture this: You recently had a great date, and the goodnight messages are coming your way. A message pops up saying, ‘I’ll never let you go.’ Initially, it seems like the ultimate romantic gesture.

But as the relationship takes a turn, those words begin to resonate in a different tone. It is no longer just a sweet promise; It becomes a literal scenario.

Your partner insists on being a part of every aspect of your life, unwilling to give you space. ‘Never Let You Go’ transforms from a line from a love song into a red flag waving in the wind, indicating unhealthy levels of attachment

12. His dating history is blurry

Usually, when you ask them about their dating history, they always talk about how crazy their exes were. Don’t fall into his trap.

We mean, they were probably crazy because this guy really drove them crazy with his manipulative behavior. If this is the only word they use to describe their partner, that’s a big red flag. In other words… run.

13. They follow you

They know every single thing about you on social media. They know who commented on your profile photo, who likes your photos the most, what you post, when you post things—they know it all. This is one of those big signs of passion that you can’t ignore.

14. They make threats to you or themselves

Because they are insecure, they feel like they won’t be able to do anything without you. If you try to break up with this person, instead of saying, “Okay, I understand,” they turn around and talk about how they want to kill themselves or they want to kill you. Will never allow anyone to break relations with them.

That is not love. If that were the case, they would undoubtedly be sad and confused, but they would let you go.

Now you know the signs of obsession, are you obsessed or in love? Is your partner obsessed or in love? If you or your partner is obsessive, you need to take steps to get out of the relationship because it will not end well for anyone.

How do you know when a lover has become obsessive?

Recognizing the signs of obsession can be difficult because you may mistake it for normal relationship behavior. Of course, your partner may be jealous. They can also be overprotective.

When a person begins to become obsessive, the signs usually emerge when it is too late to control their impulses. They can be neurotic, aggressive and irrational. They will start questioning everything you do. They will impose strict rules that were previously unnecessary.

Why do people become obsessed with their partners?

Some people are susceptible to obsession because of their past experiences. How we react depends on how we were brought up or what we have gone through in the past. Here are some of the most common reasons why people become obsessed:

1. stroke

When a person experiences heartbreak, betrayal, or insult, they will develop various defense mechanisms that can help them cope.

Obsessive people will attempt to control their partners by focusing on non-existent issues or transgressions because this gives them some semblance of control.

2. Social impact

Society also contributes to the paranoia and perceptions of obsessive people. If a person bases his thought processes on how society views relationships, he can become possessive.

They end up expecting the worst because society says it is inevitable.

3. Conditioning

How we grew up can also influence our tendency toward obsession. If you grew up thinking you should react this way, you will undoubtedly apply this to your relationships in your adult life.

4. Psychological problems

Most of the above examples can go beyond extremes when linked to a personality disorder or a different underlying psychological problem.

Obsession is not considered normal behavior. It can never be used in light contexts because it implies an overly intense fixation on a person, situation, or mentality.

Effect of obsessive love on the obsessive

You’ve seen the signs: Your partner’s obsessive love is more intense than your grandmother’s question as to why you’re still single. But what happens when you have binoculars? Let’s explore the less-than-rosy side effects of being obsessive.

1. Hello, Paranoia, my old friend

For being…