If you’re interested in unicorns, learn the do’s, don’ts, and red flags of becoming a unicorn. And learn these secrets to navigate a fun, tricky threesome.
Have you ever heard of unicorning? No, this is not a mythical journey through enchanted forests with rainbow horses – although that sounds wonderful.
In the field of relationships and threesomes, learning to be a unicorn is about learning the art of joining a couple as the third romantic or sexual partner. Yes, you are that shiny, rare addition that adds extra sparkle to an already established connection!
So why is the unicorn status considered so mythical and attractive?
For starters, it adds an extra layer of complexity, excitement, and honestly – novelty to the romantic dynamic. Couples often look for that elusive “unicorn” to add a touch of magic to their lives.
But becoming a successful unicorn isn’t all rainbows and sunshine. It is an art and a science. If you want to learn the ropes then stay tuned, as we will equip you with essential tips, dos and don’ts that can make or break your unicorning experience.
Psychology of Unicorning
Before we get into the specifics of how to become a unicorn, it’s important to understand why this role is so attractive in the first place.
Understanding the psychology behind unicorning not only makes the journey more gratifying but also helps you navigate the complex emotional terrain that comes with it.
First, let’s talk about New Relationship Energy or NRE. Have you ever felt that electric excitement when you meet someone new? He is playing NRE.
For couples, presenting a unicorn can recharge that initial thrill, giving the relationship a psychological jolt.
Robert Sternberg’s ‘triangular theory of love’ applies here too. A successful romantic relationship often has three components: intimacy, passion, and commitment. A unicorn can add that missing ‘spice’ – which is often a renewal of passion – that keeps the relationship alive.
We humans are novelty seeking creatures, it’s linked to our biology. The attraction of something new and exciting plays an important role in human attraction.
That’s exactly what a unicorn offers – a fresh perspective, a new dynamic, and yes, a certain level of unpredictability that keeps things interesting.
Essential Tips on How to Suggest a Couple Friend
Now that you’ve decided to step into the fascinating world of unicorning, how do you approach the couple you’ve got your eye on?
Here, we’ll provide some well-tested tips on how to give subtle hints to couple friends. Trust us, a little ingenuity and a little timing goes a long way.
1. Nonverbal Cues: The Art of Mirroring
Mirroring is the act of copying someone else’s body language or tone of voice. It creates a feeling of connection and synergy.
While spending time as a couple, engage in astute reflection. If one of them leans back, you lean back. If they smile, you smile.
2. Power of active listening
Active listening doesn’t just mean nodding your head while the other person is talking. It’s engaging and asking insightful questions.
Use this technique to steer the conversation toward relationships, love, or even the concept of unicorning.
You could say, “I’ve read some interesting things about how introducing a third person can rekindle the passion in a relationship. What are your thoughts?”
3. Double entendres and humor
If the conversation is going on and excitement is high, it might be a good idea to make a double entendre or a playful joke. For example, if you’re discussing weekend plans, you might say, “Well, it’s a party of three, right?”
4. Time and context
Environment and timing are important in dropping these signals. For example, a casual wine night is a much better setting than a hurried morning coffee.
Make sure you choose a comfortable environment where everyone isn’t on alert and the focus is on enjoying each other’s company.
5. Direct approach
Sometimes, straightforwardness is appreciated. If the environment is right and you have laid the groundwork through the above methods, you can directly mention your interest in becoming a unicorn.
Where to meet interested couples
So you’ve mastered the art of dropping hints to your couple friends, but why stop there? Expanding your horizons may find you a perfect match, and there are more places worth seeing than you might think.
1. Online Platform
When it comes to unicorning, online platforms like dating apps and websites specializing in open relationships can be your best friends.
Create a profile that makes your intentions clear: You are interested in joining a couple. The beauty of going digital is that you can clearly describe what you are looking for while sitting in the comfort of your home.
2. Events leaning towards open relationships and polygamy
Although attending these gatherings for the first time can be a little intimidating, keep in mind that everyone else is there for the same reasons, making it easier to break the ice and establish relationships.
3. Social Media
Social media platforms can also serve as valuable tools when looking for a match. No, you don’t need to slide into someone’s DMs right away *unless you want to*.
But you can also join groups, follow pages, or hashtags related to unicorning or open relationships. Leaning into social proof can help here, if other people see that you’re actively involved or supported by communities they trust, your desirability as a unicorn can increase.
Check out bulletin boards at local cafes, or search for community events related to topics related to relationships and sexuality.
Sometimes, a local workshop or a discussion panel can be a more intimate setting to meet couples interested in bringing a unicorn.
5. Friends of friends
Sometimes the connection you’re looking for is just a mutual friend away. Tell your close, trusted friends that you are interested in exploring the role of a unicorn.
You’d be surprised how often people are more connected than they think. This is an indirect approach, but sometimes the best recommendations come from people who already know you well.
6. Exclusive Bars and Clubs
Nightlife isn’t just for singles and traditional couples. Some bars and clubs specifically promote alternative lifestyles, including polyamory and open relationships.
7. Vacation Hotspot
Believe it or not, there are resorts and cruises that specifically cater to polyamorous and open relationships. These can be great places to meet interested couples while enjoying the sun and surf.
Plus, if you’re on a vacation made for open relationships, you can be pretty sure that everyone you meet is at least open to the idea of getting involved with a unicorn.
8. Workshops and Seminars
Although it may seem a bit formal, workshops and seminars on sexuality, relationships and personal development can be prime hunting grounds.
Such settings not only attract open-minded individuals but also create a safe space for open dialogue. You’re learning something valuable, making it a win-win situation while fleshing out potential pairings.
9. Volunteering for relevant causes
Open relationships and being active in communities or causes related to alternative sexualities can also lead to meaningful connections.
10. Online Forums and Blogs
Participating in relevant online forums and blogs can be a great way to meet like-minded couples. You can ask questions, share experiences and even DM interested parties.
These platforms often have dedicated sections for people who want to become a unicorn specifically, making your search even easier.
Do’s and Don’ts to become a unicorn
Diving into the unicorn lifestyle without some basic rules is like eating soup with a fork – you’ll miss a lot, and it can get messy.
So let’s list some do’s and don’ts that you might want to keep in mind.
1. Do: Communicate openly while practicing ’emotional intelligence’
Communication is important in any relationship, but when you’re navigating a three-way dynamic, it’s absolutely vital. Understanding not only your own feelings but also your partner’s feelings can be of great help.
2. Don’t: Break the boundaries of an existing relationship
In your role as a unicorn, you are the guest star, not the director of the show. Every couple will have their own rules and boundaries, and it’s important to respect these.
Breaking them is not just a mistake, it can end your partnership and harm the couple’s relationship.
3. Do: Keep it discreet but transparent
Here’s the ultimate paradox: You’ll want to be an open book with the couple but a closed diary to the world.
What happens in a threesome should be open to discussion between the three of you, but not necessarily anyone else’s.
4. Don’t: Assume You’re the Only Unicorn
The term ‘exclusive’ may not always apply, even if you are joining an established couple. It’s important to clarify expectations—are you their only unicorn, or is it an open field?
Making assumptions can cause emotional turmoil, so it’s best to clarify this beforehand.
5. Do: Prioritize your comfort and limitations
Just because you’re joining a couple doesn’t mean your comfort and boundaries have to take a backseat. Keep them informed from the beginning.
6. Don’t: Ignore power dynamics
Being a unicorn means you are entering an already established relationship, and that comes with its own dynamics.
Be aware of how your presence may alter the balance and aim to create a positive enhancement rather than a point of tension.
7. Do: Take time for self-assessment
Before diving into the unicorn lifestyle, take some time to consider your motivations and desires.
Understanding your reasons for getting into unicorning can help you find matches that meet your expectations, making it a more satisfying experience for all parties involved.
8. What not to do: Neglect safe sex
Even in extreme heat, safety should never be ignored. Be sure to discuss contraception and STI prevention methods with the couple.
9. Do: Be open to experimentation
If you’re stepping into a unique role like a unicorn, that willingness to experiment can be a boon.
10. What not to do: Expect equal attention from both partners
When you’re a unicorn, the needs and desires of three people come into play. Understand that both partners’ attention may not always be equally distributed.
This isn’t necessarily a red flag, it’s just part of navigating a three-way dynamic.
11. Do: Clarify the couple’s relationship status
It’s essential to know whether the couple is in an open relationship, looking for a third long-term experience, or just a one-time experience.
Knowing this in advance can help you avoid potential misunderstandings and align your expectations with theirs.
12. Don’t: Keep score
Trying to maintain an exact number of kisses, hugs, and other forms of affection will only add unnecessary stress.
Focus on experiences and connections rather than keeping a mental scoreboard.
13. Do: Be open to future opportunities
Just because an experience as a unicorn didn’t go according to plan doesn’t mean you should cut yourself off from future opportunities.
Unicorning is as much about personal growth and discovery as it is about the relationships you build.
14. What not to do: Neglect yourself…
Welcome to XTalkies
Your Ultimate Destination for Entertainment and Stories!
At XTalkies, we bring the magic of cinema, storytelling, and digital entertainment straight to your screen. Whether you’re a movie enthusiast, a series binge-watcher, or someone looking for the latest updates in the world of entertainment, we’ve got you covered.