40 Ways Guys Manipulate and Control Girlfriends, Influence and Escape Tips

Have you ever felt like your guy kept you on a short leash? Now it’s time to read how guys try to manipulate and control their girlfriends.

This is a common scenario: When a friend is dating someone who exhibits control issues, it’s clear to us that the relationship is unhealthy. However, when we find ourselves in similar situations, it can be challenging to recognize the ways people manipulate and control their girlfriends.

The nature of manipulation in relationships

First things first, let’s figure out what manipulation in relationships really looks like. It’s not always the dramatic performance we see in the movies. In reality, it’s much more subtle and, to be honest, somewhat covert.

Insecurity, a fundamental aspect of the human condition, as noted by philosophers such as Hobbes, plays an important role.

For some people, this awareness manifests in their need to control their girlfriends, which is an attempt to balance their own deep weaknesses and insecurities. By holding the reins of their relationships tightly, they are, in a way, trying to keep their fears at bay.

Now, the tricky thing about manipulation is how it enters a relationship. It doesn’t enter inside, it moves quietly. It might start with something that seems harmless enough, like slightly influencing decisions.

But then, it slowly escalates to more serious things – we’re talking about the classic ways guys manipulate and control their girlfriends. It is a slow and steady progress that can leave one feeling lost and confused.

On the other hand, manipulation does not just mean give and take. It is about shaping someone’s behavior or feelings without the same level of respect or consideration for their well-being.

Common manipulation tactics used by boys

Ladies, distinguishing between a controlling boyfriend and one who is absolutely madly in love can be a real head-scratcher. Or are they the same thing?

1. He emotionally blackmails you and torments you with guilt

The classic “If you loved me, you wouldn’t…” line. sounds familiar? This is emotional blackmail. He is playing with your emotions to manipulate your decisions and actions.

2. He gaslights you

He may deny saying things clearly stated, or distort the facts to suit his story. This can create self-doubt and confusion, weakening your sense of self and your trust in your own perceptions and memories.

3. He isolates you from friends and family

By cutting you off from your support system, he gains more control. This separation is not always clear. This may start out as small comments about the time you spend with others, gradually building up to explicit demands. The goal is to make you emotionally and socially dependent on him.

4. He pulls the victim card and assigns blame

Whenever a problem occurs, it is by no means his fault. If he is playing the victim, he is avoiding accountability and making you feel responsible for his actions or the problems in your relationship.

Adopting this tactic can make you more empathetic and more likely to accept her wishes to ‘make things right’.

5. He withholds affection or resources as a form of control

This can be as obvious as withholding money or as subtle as withdrawing emotional support. This is a way to punish you for not living up to his expectations and to train you to behave the way he wants.

6. He makes all the decisions

Sure, it may seem nice at first when he chooses restaurants or plans a weekend getaway. But when he starts making choices about your career, your clothes, and even your friendships, it’s a red flag.

This control strategy can make you feel like a passenger in your life, not like a driver. Psychologically, this takes away your sense of autonomy, which is a vital element for personal well-being.

7. He keeps an eye on your activities

At first, his “checking in” may feel like he’s just caring, but there’s a fine line between caring and controlling. When he starts tracking your every move, it’s not just invasive; This is a form of control.

Such constant monitoring can lead to a loss of privacy and autonomy, making you feel as if you are living under a microscope.

8. He constantly criticizes you

There’s constructive criticism, and then there’s this. When nothing you do seems good enough for him, that’s a problem.

9. He bullies you

Whether he is threatening to break up with you, harm himself, or even harm you, this is a huge threat. It’s all about creating fear in order to manipulate and control you.

The underlying psychological principle here is coercion, a form of psychological abuse that creates a power imbalance in the relationship.

10. He uses jealousy as a tool

Oh, the drama! He flirts with others in front of you or accuses you of being too friendly with a coworker. What classic manipulation.

11. He burdens you with responsibilities

Suddenly, you’re the one handling all the work, bills, and maybe even her emotions. This overload isn’t just exhausting, it has a way of keeping you so busy and overwhelmed that you don’t have the time or energy to challenge the dynamics of your relationship.

Doing this changes the balance of power, making you more dependent on him and less likely to feel able to manage without him.

12. He uses love bombing

It’s like a fairy tale in fast forward. In the beginning, he showers you with love, gifts, and grand gestures. But it’s not just romance, it’s a strategy for creating a strong emotional bond instantly.

13. He downplays your successes

Whether it’s a promotion at work or a personal goal you’ve achieved, he finds a way to make it seem less important. Instead of being your biggest cheerleader, he is the first one to belittle your accomplishments, which can be detrimental to your self-esteem and sense of accomplishment, as he tries to keep you from feeling too confident or independent. Is.

14. He uses sexual manipulation

Well, not going to lie, this one is particularly fraudulent. He may make you feel guilty for not being in the mood or use intimacy to make up after a fight.

15. He plays mind games

One day he is sweet and loving, the next day he is cold and distant. These mind games are designed to keep you guessing and off balance.

The thing is, unpredictability can create an anxiety-induced need for stability, making you more likely to do what he wants in hopes of returning to the ‘good times’.

16. He makes you doubt your friends and family

In this manipulation tactic, he subtly undermines the intentions of those closest to you. You’re probably wondering, “Why does he do this?” As they suggest your friends or family are jealous or don’t understand the dynamics of your relationship.

The goal here is to isolate you, making you more dependent on him and less connected to your support network.

17. He exercises financial control

If he’s spending all the money in your relationship, be careful. This could mean that he is controlling your joint finances, or worse, could make you feel guilty about the way he spends your money.

This financial control can make you feel dependent and powerless. This is a classic strategy to limit your freedom, while ensuring that you are tied to him financially.

18. He ignores your boundaries

This kind of behavior shows a lack of respect for your personal space and choices. This is a form of psychological control, the purpose of which is to break down your boundaries so that you become more flexible to his wishes.

19. He engages in public humiliation

In social settings, he may make jokes at your expense or criticize you in front of others. This isn’t just weird, it’s a form of control designed to embarrass you and assert their dominance.

Not only does it undermine your self-confidence, it also aims to tarnish your image in the eyes of others by adding social pressure to the mix of manipulative behaviour.

20. He dismisses your feelings and thoughts

Whenever you express how you feel or share your thoughts, he may ignore them, calling them overreactions or trivial. “You’re being too sensitive,” he might say.

Psychological impact on girlfriend

Girlfriends, have you ever wondered how manipulation really affects you? The secret thing about manipulation is that it’s not always obvious to you. It’s like a slow drop that slowly fills the bucket. If you are noticing some of these traits in yourself, there is a high possibility that you are being manipulated.

1. Erosion of self-esteem and self-worth

You may start to believe his or her negative comments, feeling less confident in making decisions or expressing your opinions. This erosion of self-esteem is linked to learned helplessness, where you begin to feel unable to improve your situation.

2. Increased anxiety, depression and stress

Living on the edge, never knowing what will happen next? This is a recipe for anxiety. The constant stress of walking on eggshells can lead to long-term anxiety and even depression.

3. Dependence and loss of personality

When he’s making all the decisions, you may start to feel like you can’t take any steps without him, until you lose touch with your identity and priorities.

4. Difficulty trusting future relationships

After being in a manipulative relationship, trusting someone new can feel like trying to climb a mountain in flip-flops – difficult and risky.

You may find yourself questioning other people’s intentions or waiting for the other shoe to drop. Lack of trust is a common result of manipulation, as it shakes the foundation of your belief about honesty and integrity in relationships.

5. Constant self-doubt

When he always questions your decisions or suggests that you are not capable enough, you may also start to doubt your own judgment. What’s worse, this self-doubt can permeate all areas of your life, causing you to second-guess your choices and abilities.

6. Feeling isolated

If he’s isolating you from friends and family, you may start to feel like you’re on a lonely island. This isolation isn’t just physical, it can also be emotional, as you may feel like no one else understands you or can’t help you. Feelings of isolation can lead to feelings of loneliness and abandonment, which can lead to increased stress and depression.

7. Emotional exhaustion

This kind of constant stress can have a significant impact on your emotional health, making everything else in life seem more challenging.

8. Hypervigilance

After experiencing manipulation, you may find yourself always looking for signs of trouble. This hyper-vigilance is like an internal alarm system that is always on high alert, which can be mentally and physically exhausting.

This can lead to anxiety and stress, because you are constantly anticipating and preparing for negative outcomes.

9. Feeling worthless or depressed

Especially in severe cases of manipulation, you may begin to feel as if you cannot be treated well, or that there is no hope for things to get better.

This feeling of worthlessness or hopelessness is a serious effect of psychological manipulation and can contribute to depression and loss of motivation to pursue your goals and interests.

10. Develop trust issues

After being manipulated, it is common to develop trust problems, not just in romantic relationships, but in all types of relationships. You may find it difficult to trust that people have good intentions, which can lead to suspicion and a reluctance to open up to others.

How to break…