It’s the 21st century, ladies! There’s no reason to sit and wait for them to make the first move—learn how to pick up guys!
When we go out, whether to a bar or a nightclub, we often expect men to attack us. It’s not about feeling like princesses, but over time, we’ve certainly become accustomed to the idea that it’s up to men to make the effort to get our attention. However, learning how to pick people up can change this dynamic, giving us the power to take the initiative when we see someone we’re interested in.
breaking stereotypes
In the 1800s, if a woman even thought about making the first move, it was met with considerable stigma. Fast forward to our era, and we are still working on this idea.
Yes, even in a world where we can order a date like pizza, the stereotype that men should always make the first move sticks like that one song you can’t get out of your head.
Think about it. How often do we hear about dating advice and automatically think it’s about men approaching women? This stereotype is not just about who buys the first drink; It is deeply rooted in our psyche.
For friends, this means bearing the burden of ‘making the first move’, which can be as nerve-wracking as a high-stakes poker game. And for women? This often means sitting on the sidelines, analyzing every glance and gesture, wondering if they are sending the right signals.
For men, it’s a refreshing change after always steering the ship. And for women, it’s like opening up a whole new level in the dating game – one where they’re in control.
Why women should know how to pick up guys
Okay ladies! You may be wondering why you should learn the ins and outs of how to choose people instead of letting them do all the work. Well, there are many good reasons to take the reins of this game of hearts into your own hands.
1. Increases self-confidence
This newfound confidence can spread to other areas of your life, making you feel invincible. Plus, who doesn’t love the rush of taking charge of a situation?
2. Breaks stereotypes
It’s 2023, and it’s time to challenge old dating norms. By taking the first step, you are showing that women can be just as courageous as men.
This not only provides liberation but also sets a progressive example for others. Every time you approach a guy, you are helping to redefine social roles.
3. Improves social skills
Connecting with someone new is a great way to hone your social skills. It’s about learning to read body language, start engaging conversations, and build real connections.
4. Expands your options
Why wait for Mr. Right to come to you? By taking the initiative, you expand your dating pool significantly. You get to choose who you want to talk to, not hope that the right person will notice you.
Taking a proactive approach means you’re more likely to find someone truly compatible.
5. Gives authority to take decisions
When you are making the choice, you are in control of your dating destiny. It’s about making deliberate choices, not passively accepting whatever comes your way.
Receiving empowerment in this way can be incredibly satisfying and invigorating. And let’s not forget, it’s always a thrill to take a shot from time to time!
6. Reduces waiting time
Let’s face it, waiting for someone to come to you can be like watching paint dry. By learning how to pick up guys, you reduce the waiting around.
7. Encourages equality
Taking the initiative in dating promotes a more level playing field. It challenges the notion that men should always lead and women should follow.
Equality can lead to more balanced and respectful relationships. Plus, many guys find it refreshing and attractive when a woman makes the first move.
8. Creates surprising opportunities
You never know what might happen when you take the first step. This can lead to a wonderful conversation, a great date, or even a meaningful relationship.
By being proactive, you open the door to unexpected and exciting possibilities. It’s like turning every walk into a potential adventure and how to pick people up.
9. Enhances personal growth
Taking responsibility for your dating life is a journey of self-discovery. You learn about your priorities, your deal-breakers, and what really motivates you to connect with someone.
This process of exploration and learning is incredibly enriching. Plus, it’s always beneficial to see yourself growing and developing.
10. It’s just plain fun
Each experience is unique and can be filled with laughter, excitement, and maybe a little mystery. After all, what’s life without a little playful adventure?
how to choose boys
There have been many times when we have seen a good looking guy, and we have spent the whole night trying to make ourselves approachable. We use the cliché ‘dance near her’ or ‘stand next to her at the bar’. We’ve tried it all.
But at that time, we never thought of going and talking to him; It never occurred to us. Strange isn’t it? And who knows what could have happened, but by not taking any action, we already know that doing nothing is the obvious outcome.
1. Don’t wait
We know you’re probably waiting for the right moment to come when you can bump into her or smile at her to get her attention. Honestly, what are you waiting for? You are wasting your time.
If you want to exchange numbers and set up a date, that’s fine, talk to her. So, don’t wait, just walk up to him and start a conversation.
2. Be yourself
3. There is no “right place”
You can meet men at bars, you can also meet them at grocery stores, bus stops, libraries, and your local swimming pool. The point is that men are everywhere. So, don’t limit yourself to just one place to find a guy.
Okay, maybe the doctor’s office isn’t the best place, but who knows, maybe it is. What I’m trying to say is that whenever you see a guy you love, talk to him.
4. Visit different places
This may be your favorite place to go, a bar or club, but you probably know everyone there. So, it’s time for you to get out and experience other places. You’ll also get a chance to meet different people than those you’d normally see on a night out.
Plus, who knows where the guy of your dreams is hanging out on a Saturday night.
5. Don’t go out with gangs of women
There’s really nothing more intimidating than being surrounded by a bunch of women staring at you and giggling while you’re talking to a guy.
If you’re going to hit on a guy, make sure your friends aren’t staring at you from across the room.
6. Be prepared
No, we don’t mean condoms, but you should always keep a few in your bag, just in case. We are talking about what happens if your phone gets switched off and you want to get his/her number? What if his phone is also switched off?
Keep a pen and a napkin or piece of paper in your bag. This way, if you need to, you can give her your number/get her number the old-fashioned way.
7. Just say hello
We know, you’re probably wondering if this can happen He Easy? well yes. Start a conversation by simply smiling and saying hello. If he’s smart, he’ll pick up on the fact that you like him, and he’ll respond.
8. Ask her to dance
We know, it sounds a bit high school, but it works like a charm. If you’re at a bar or near the dance floor and see a cute guy next to you, just turn to him and ask him if he wants to dance.
If he says no, go to the dance floor and dance anyway. You can’t lose. Either way, you know how to dance.
9. Use your surroundings as a subject
If you’re nervous and unsure what to talk about, that’s okay, use what’s around you. Maybe you’re at the bar and the music is really good or you’re at the gym and it’s her leg day *she’s a keeper*.
The point is, you have an endless source of conversation material literally all around you.
10. Be social
The only way to meet people, especially men, is if you are social. Whether you’re at a bar, a chess club, or a running club, you need to socialize.
11. Don’t think too much
You might be feeling angry or overanalyzing certain things before, during, and after talking to a guy, but don’t do that. All this will lead you down the path of insecurity and fear, these are two things you do not need in your life. If you overanalyze, you will feel overwhelmed and out of touch with the situation.
12. Feel sexy and confident
If you feel sexy, fine, he’ll see it. Before you figure out how to pick up guys, you’ll want to feel good about yourself when you approach them.
13. Flash a genuine smile
Nothing breaks the ice like a warm, genuine smile. This is a universal sign of friendliness and approachability that can make you more attractive.
When you smile, it not only improves your mood but also makes you more attractive to others. Plus, it’s a great way to show that you’re interested without even saying a word.
14. Show your sense of humor
Let your sense of humor shine. A good laugh not only reduces stress but also creates a bond. Jokes or playful teasing can be a great way to gauge his sense of humor and see if you’re on the same wavelength. Remember, laughter is a key ingredient in making people happy.
15. Initiate light physical contact
Of course, always be mindful of his comfort and boundaries. Just as you wouldn’t want to feel upset if someone is attacking you, always be sure to respect their personal space and boundaries. This subtle approach can speak volumes in the language of attraction.
16. Compliment him sincerely
Everyone appreciates a genuine compliment. Find something about her that you really like – maybe it’s her style, her smile, or her funny comments.
A compliment can open the door to further conversation and show that you’re paying attention. Plus, it’s a great way to make someone feel good about themselves.
17. Show interest in her interests
If he mentions an interest or hobby, show genuine curiosity. Asking questions about her passions not only keeps the conversation going but also shows that you care about her interests.
18. Offer to buy her a drink
This is a classic role reversal and a clear sign of your interest. Offering to buy her a drink can be a great conversation starter and puts you in the driver’s seat.
It’s a simple gesture that breaks traditional norms and can be quite empowering. Plus, it’s a direct way to show that you’re interested and generous.
19. Leave a little mystery
Although it’s great to be open, it can be interesting to leave a little to the imagination. Share about yourself, but don’t reveal everything at once.
This creates an atmosphere of mystery and gives him reason to want to know more about you. After all, a little mystery of how to choose people can add a lot of charm to the game.
20. You’re going to be rejected
Dealing with Rejection When Choosing Boys
Stepping into the dating arena and learning how to pick up guys sometimes means facing the tougher side of things: rejection.
It’s a universal experience, but the good news is that it doesn’t have to get you down. Let’s explore some ways to handle rejection with grace and flexibility.
1. Reshape your perspective
Remember, rejection is not a personal indictment of your worth; This is just a sign of mismatched expectations or chemistry.
2. Practice self-compassion
It’s important to be kind to yourself after facing rejection. Let yourself be disappointed, but don’t let it…
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